It is coming to the end of Dyslexia Awareness Week, and I wanted to mark it in some way.
Continue reading “Dyslexia Awareness Week”
Strange wicker owl thingy says SORT YOUR LIFE OUT.
Not you personally, me. I’ve been in limbo since the end of August – I didn’t have a break after the fringe madness, just went straight back to full time temping, waiting for a reprieve that I recently discovered isn’t going to come.
So I spoke to the wicker owl thingy and it told me to stop whinging and get on with it. Some people, it pointed out, in a voice suspiciously like my sister’s, have no legs – and they get on with things just fine. It is time to sort out the flat (which is a tip), schedule some blog posts, get some scran* in and finish editing some of these freakin’ books. What’s more, it’s time to do it all flexibly, around the edges of life and without a set routine, because the perfect part time job is clearly not forthcoming and I’m likely going to temp till I die, sometimes full time and sometimes not. I must therefore be flexible, like some sort of female google CEO. I’ve started by writing this post on my phone moments before leaving the house.
Happy Monday to you all. I am off to work.
*scran means food, non-Scottish readers
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And lo, it is the end of September, and time for another Pictonaut Challenge. This is a very early draft (as in I started it at 18:54 and finished it about 10 minutes ago) and lacks my usual levels of whimsy. And that is all I can think to say about that.
Continue reading “The Journey – September’s Pictonaut Challenge”
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You may be all hot and bothered about the release of JK Rowling‘s longed for new novel The Casual Vacancy tomorrow, but that’s nothing compared to the emotional torment of waiting for the fiction debut of Andrew Blair and Daniel Lilley. That’s right, I could only be talking about The R-Patz Factz, a new book exploring the life and loves of Twilight actor Robert Pattinson by committing to doing no research on them whatsoever. In the following guest post, Andrew tells me more about what inspired him to create this thing.
In the spirit of full disclosure, I should probably point out a) the aforementioned author is my boyfriend, and b) Robert Pattinson in no way endorses or knows about the project.
Continue reading “Edinburgh Man Writes Book About Twilight Actor Robert Pattinson”
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The Registrar blinked owlishly over the rims of unnaturally vivid fuschia glasses.
“Are you absolutely sure, Mr and Mrs McBevis?”
“Actually I’m Ms,” said Ms McBevis, “I kept my own name when we married.”
“But it says here that you’re both McBevis.”
“Yes, funny coincidence really – we were both called McBevis already. We met at a social event for people with the surname McBevis. But we aren’t related.”
“We checked the family trees to be sure,” Mr McBevis added, “genealogy is quite fascinating. It turned out my great great aunt Mavis McBevis was actually a tree.”
“A great lusty oak,” his wife added enthusiastically.
“I see,” said the registrar, who didn’t really see, but was beginning to find the whole conversation rather tiring. “Well, it’s a small world I suppose.”
The McBevis’s nodded vigorously, so the registrar got in there before they started talking again –
“And you are absolutely sure about the baby’s name?”
“Of course we’re sure,” Ms McBevis said, “why shouldn’t we be?”
“You want to call the baby Horace McBevis?”
“Yes.”
The registrar coughed in an embarrassed sort of way.
“It’s just that… Well. Horace seems a slightly unusual choice for a little girl.”
The new parents rolled their eyes at one another.
“We don’t want to force gender roles on our children,” Mr McBevis said, in the tones one might use to address a small dog. “This is the 21st century, you know.”
“I understand that, Mr McBevis,” she began, “but -”
“But what?”
Many thoughts went through the registrar’s head.
But couldn’t you choose a unisex name, like Madison or Jo?
But don’t you realise that poor little girl is going to be bullied within an inch of her life?
But it’s 5.05pm and I am off the clock.
“Nothing,” said the registrar, handing over the certificate and pulling on her anorak in one deft move, “it’s lovely. Goodbye.”
And that, dear reader, is the tale of how Horace McBevis got her name.
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I wrote a short story about a French orphan called Elodie Laroche, and the nice people at Outside Thoughts (a fiction podcast) got an actor called Amy Hall to read it out at an event in Glasgow. You can listen to it at this link:
http://outsidethoughts.com/?p=382
12 Books in 12 Months 